Other times, I like to develop an entirely new identity. I shall go to the moustache store and purchase a new type of moustache, and sit in the park in suede bathrobe with my best friend - and hamster - Giggles, while watching the neighbourhood children play. The mothers tell their children to stay away from me, and I don't mind, because I'm feeling like a pedophile today. Tomorrow I'll get dressed in my black jeans and go to the mall like everyone else, but today, I've embraced my creepy new identity.
Peace and love to the children,